He was sitting on our bed eating chips, the fucker. By “our”, mine and Terri’s bed, I never
shared a bed with Phil. But there he
was, sitting there as I fumbled drunkenly through the door in to the dismal
studio flat Terri and I had called home for the past two months. Eating chips.
I kind of knew what was going on but suppressed this inwardly and
carried on blithely in hope that I was wrong.
Terri had just asked him back for a coffee after seeing this god-awful
band. Dumpy’s Rusty Nuts? Jesus! What sort of a fucking name was that,
sounded too much like a novelty band? Anyway, having him back like this was an
action extremely inappropriate; what with her boyfriend out and all but
probably by design; knowing Terri. She
was winding me up, teaching me a lesson.
“Alright?” I nodded to Phil.
“Alright”. Phil nodded back.
He certainly did not hint towards what was going on in the kitchen.
Terri was packing some things. She was going. Still this did not really register though I
knew it to be true. She already had a
bag packed but was filling another with kitchen items; knife, fork, spoon, mug,
plate and so on. Was she going camping?
“What’s going on?” I slurred.
“I’m going, I’ve had enough.
I’m going with Phil.”
Two helmets. There
were TWO motorbike helmets on the bed with loathsome Phil and his chips and his
biker jacket and denim cut off and Saxon and Status Quo patches. She was leaving me for a man who openly
admitted to liking Status Quo. Oh, the
shame.
I stomped back in to the bedroom/lounge/dining area and
stared at him. He was so fucking ugly,
how could she? I know she’d got off with
him last week but surely that was just to teach me a lesson: an easy snog to
taunt me with.
“Enjoy your fuck, did you?” I snarled. A slight tremor in my voice, the pitch a
little too high. I’m a lover, not a
fighter and by all the evidence before me, not much of a lover. Phil seemed
bigger than me, perhaps more by the way he carried himself, confident in a way
only the slightly stupid can achieve.
“I’ll let you know”, he responded, dead pan. Brilliant! If only I could have been that
calm. Was he used to absconding in to
the night with other bloke’s girlfriends or was I just so little of a threat to
him that he could not generate the adrenaline to rise to my baiting of
him? I slumped back in to one of the two
chairs in the room, the one that had been left out from the dining table when I
had stormed in to the kitchen four hours earlier, enraged at Terri’s refusal to
wash up. Is this it, she’s finally
leaving me because of an argument about washing the plates? The four or five pints of Newcastle Brown in
my gut began to agitate. I felt a little sick… the thought that I could puke in
front of Phil bolstered me a little, I concentrated on keeping the contents of
my guts where they were… at least until they’d gone.
The evening behind me now seemed so long ago, even the parts
that had happened barely fifteen minutes ago.
Terri had decided not to go out with Phil, Julian and Wayne; she would
stay in, spend quality time with me, a conciliatory night in, put all this
recent bother behind us. I was glad,
didn’t trust Julian at all, he clearly had the hots for Terri. Then she’d left
the washing up, said she’d do it later. I cook, she washes, I dry. But she wouldn’t. I’d sworn, started doing it myself. She’d stormed out; she will go out after all
if I’m going to be like that. I’d followed
her through the door two minutes later, drawn out my last ten pounds from the
cash point, gone to the pub, spent the evening in the Claremont getting a bit
drunk and flirting with a girl called Louise I knew from college. From a
romantic night in to splitting up in five minutes, though I didn’t know it then
of course. I bloody knew it now!
She called Phil to the kitchen, he reported to her
instruction, a few mumbled words and he came back, said “See you later mate”
and left. See you later? It could have been a threat but it didn’t
sound like it, more like he just didn’t want to leave without saying something
and this was all his limited imagination could come up with.
“See ya”. What? Why did I say that? I wanted this cunt dead and I’m bidding him a
fond farewell. Perhaps it is this lacking in the alpha male stakes that has
lead to this situation.
Terri followed when she heard the door. She had been ready to leave but wanted to
talk to me first. Alone. I don’t remember the words or even the sentiments of
what she said, I just remember it started out almost as an apology but
descended in to a scolding and insults.
I gave her the birthday presents I’d bought for her already, her
birthday was not for another three weeks.
Did I think this would change her mind, make her stay? She thanked me, looked almost humble for a
second.
“Please stay”.
“I can’t”
I sat back in the chair, resigned to the turn of
events. She opened the door.
“And by the way, you’re a crap kisser”. And she was gone. I turned off the light, laid on the bed,
something crumpled beneath me. The chips.
He’d taken my love and left me with half a bag of cold chips.
****
